A lot of men, even those who do a good job with their profiles, kill their chances to have an affair with a bored & lonely housewife with the ridiculously lame intro emails they send. This is one of those things that seems like it should be so simple, yet the reality is that most men get it all wrong! If you’ve ever heard men pissing and moaning that sites like MILF Book aren’t getting them laid, rest assured, it’s not the site. It’s them. And in all likelihood, it’s what they’re saying (or not saying) in these incredibly important first impression emails that is screwing them out of getting screwed. This isn’t rocket science. A lot of it goes back to Step 1, where we talked about the psychology of connecting with lonely housewives by knowing what they’re thinking. Along with the information provided here, it’s probably a good idea to re-read step one before you start sending off emails.
We had a group of testers send out dozens of emails to women on the top 5 lonely housewife and affair dating sites, and kept track of what worked and what didn’t. Here are some examples of emails that totally bombed with an explanation of why they didn’t work. Women either didn’t respond or send rude brush off responses to these guys, and none of them got the testers in the sack with even a single woman.
Example Emails That Failed
I’d love to take you out for dinner and then eat you for dessert. OMG, your profile pictures got me so hard. Just imagining my cock in between your enormous titties pushed me over the edge. Don’t worry, though… I give as good as I get. I’ll eat your dripping wet pussy until you cum harder than you’ve ever cum before.
Why Its Wrong
Hopefully you already know what’s wrong with this, but if you don’t, let me break it down for you. This dude comes across as a totally immature pervert. He sounds like a horny fourteen year old boy trying to lose his virginity, not a grown man looking for an affair. This is going to be a total turn-off to married women.
My name is Dan. I’m 32. I own a carwash. In my spare time I love going to Star Trek Conventions and spending time in nature. I’m just a pretty average nice guy. I’d like to meet a nice lady to spend some time with.
Why Its Wrong
Snore. Are your eyelids getting droopy? Yeah, that’s what I thought. The woman reading this is probably half-comatose from boredom. He makes himself sound about as interesting as a documentary about mold.<
Do you like a man who knows how to put a woman in her place? Do you fantasize about being battered and bruised? If you take your meals out of a dog bowl instead of at the table because you know you’re not worthy to sit with the people, I’ll put you in your place and keep you there. Submit to Master.
Why Its Wrong
So let’s say maybe this guy isn’t actually a psychopath, he’s just really into BDSM and plays the part well. In that case, he needs to get off the bored & lonely housewife sites and go look somewhere that caters to that fetish only. To most women, he is just going to sound terrifying and deranged. No woman wants to worry that her affair could take a dangerous turn. If you’ve got some kinks, your profile might not be the place to delve into them. Wait until you’re really talking, then tread gently and slowly to see if she’s into it, too.
Here are three examples of messages that worked exceptionally well for our testers. They had excellent success with these emails on Easy Sex, Lonely Wives Club, Freehookups Affairs Club, and Hookup Cloud.
Example Emails That Succeeded: Feel Free to Copy/Past & Use Yourself
My name is Eric, and I’m a firefighter, triathlon competitor, and a guitarist. Even though I’m a busy guy, when I saw your profile, I knew that I had to see if you’d like to meet for drinks. It was the sparkle in your amazing green eyes that really got to me, but when I saw that you play mandolin, that sealed the deal. Most women on here don’t post anything like that about themselves, and I liked it that you shared more than the fact that you were looking for an affair. I like to feel like I’m getting to know someone before I go there, you know what I mean?
Why Its Right
He wrote that he’s a firefighter, an athlete, and a musician. He humanized himself, and just so happened to do it using things that women find sexy. He personalized it by mentioning her eye color and the instrument she plays, so she knows it isn’t a form email he sends to everyone. And he wrapped it up by saying her likes to get to know women a bit before he sleeps with them. No wonder he scored so often with variations on this email!
When I saw your profile, I thought you were so beautiful, you were probably out of my league. Then I looked at some of the other guys’ profiles on here and decided I had to contact you. You seem far too intelligent and lovely to have to settle for creepy old men or perverted frat boys, so I figured it was worth a shot! I’m 41, married, discreet, I shower every day, and I won’t send you messages that look like porn scripts. If you’d like to meet up this weekend, I promise I’ll continue the trend by showing up clean-cut and behaving like a gentleman.
Why Its Right
This one works well because the writer shows empathy. He knows she must be fed up with dealing with gross guys. He lets her know he won’t be one of them, offering a sense of safety and respect.
I know this is going to sound crazy, but I think that you’re my New Year’s Resolution! My resolution was to find a beautiful woman with auburn hair, blue eyes, intelligence, and a great sense of humor to spend time with. I even wrote it down. And then, there you were! If you’d like to meet, we can celebrate like it’s New Year’s Eve. So what if we’re a little bit late? It’s always a good time for a party! Let me know if you’re free this weekend, I’d love to buy you a drink.
Why Its Right
If you’re thinking this seems cheesy, you’re right. It is. But it’s endearingly cheesy, because it’s got a touch of romantic/magical thinking, which women love.
Stick to writing emails like the last three examples, and your success rate will be better than 90% for the women you contact with them. Unless you write for a living, there’s no reason to reinvent the wheel. Stick with what works. Just make sure to change them up a bit to make them personal.